Why This Won’t Be The Worst Christmas Ever…
What is it about Christmas? It can bring out the worst in people, the best in others, and for some it conjures up deep-seated memories, beliefs, sadness, and behaviours manifesting into feverish desires to hang onto some long-held childhood image or fantasy... Or spending, splurging, and imbibing beyond their means.
I suppose it’s not true of everyone and perhaps I’m simply tired and cynical of the societal influences seemingly more blatant, oppressive for some, and creating new angst amongst families in this year of Covid. I don’t know if it’s true for any, most or all. I do know I am searching for a new meaning to Christmas - one filled with love for all humankind, one of kindness and understanding, one of open dialogue and respected opinion without fear of hatred, violence, or betrayal.
What is your most beloved memory?
For some (I like to think many) and certainly for myself, it harkens back to childhood, perhaps in part due to the innocence of a lifetime ago. When I close my eyes, I am immediately transported to the living room of my beloved “Granny”. The curtains still drawn, the piano silent in the corner and the tree magically birthed with a modest myriad of festively adorned packages. Amongst the gifts lie three slightly stuffed stockings, each with a snow-white fold leading to the apple red felt, the toe stuffed with a mandarin orange (still wrapped in green tissue). The scent envelopes my senses even now.
The eve of Christmas shines with its own glory, celebrating the German tradition of my Grandparents, gathered in their living room sharing open-faced sandwiches of liverwurst (pronounced liverVurst in my world) over german rye bread, butter oozing toward the crust… the adults (not my mom) cheering with shots of vodka and eggnog. Opening gifts… Grandma’s, sitting silently unopened until the rest were done.Waking in the morning, my sisters and I gather up our stockings anxious to discover what hidden treasures lie inside. Granny already in the kitchen, mom would be there soon and dad choosing to stay in the warmth and comfort of bed. This was our chance, our moment of victory… sneaking into the room while he pretended to sleep, giggling at the knowing of melting snow in our hands…
What is your worst Christmas memory?
I was 17, maybe 18 and for the first time spending a part of Christmas away from my family. It’s inevitable of course, as we grow into adulthood. It’s not so much what happened on this Christmas eve, it’s the unravelling and realization that the world I know to be true, is not the truth for all.There’s no value in reliving this moment. Instead, I choose appreciation for all the good times, memories, and experiences. We all have some hidden demon threatening to absorb the joy of our cherished moments. For some, it’s rooted in a deep loss of someone or something, the simple act of remembering paralyzing any act of celebration. Perhaps it's loneliness, illness, or fear… Whatever your lens, I offer you this in the hopes it may fill your world with a little more love, kindness, and understanding.
For if I dream of a world-embracing open dialogue and respected opinion without fear of hatred, violence, or betrayal, I must practice, model, and believe as deeply as I once believed in Santa Claus.
Hmmm… did my search lead me right here, to this moment of reflection and discovery? I don’t need to find a new meaning to Christmas. I simply need to make it so, through my own lens, and allow others the same. It’s not up to me to put my meaning onto anyone else, nor does the spirit of Christmas belong only on one day, one time of year. The meaning of my life is what I’ve been searching for and I know it to be held in love, kindness, understanding, open dialogue, and respected opinion without fear of hatred, violence, or betrayal.Whatever this season conjures up for you and despite what may be an interruption of long-held traditions, I wish you and all of your loved ones a safe and healthy rest of the year!What is your meaning to Christmas? I invite you to share your memories with me… You can do so in confidence right here.Want to learn more about creating meaning? Check out some of my other life notes:What if Someday Never ComesHow to Rekindle Your Soul Through Listening How I kicked FEAR in the ASS