7 Lessons for My 21 Year Old Self
Put your ear close to your heart and listen hard. It’s me……showing you the way. Follow that voice, the one that brings you joy, happiness and fulfillment. Your heart and soul will lead you to your greatest passion, your truest purpose. All you have to do......is really listen.
They’re not really my words. I borrowed them from this much smarter, much younger yoga teacher named Nina. She tells me it’s what she is teaching her children. It inspired me to share it with all of you …. and of course, my 21 year old self. I am reminded that at its deepest, my heart craves to help others; to influence, to encourage, to INSPIRE… just one small thing for just one person each day that I breathe.However unlikely it may seem that I would have listened at 21, if this awakens the slightest insight, inspiration, courage, change for just one person …. well then, I’ve given the greatest gift I could ever imagine.So here they are, in no particular order… Let each one “marinate” and experience what comes of it...
#1 - Allow imperfection in yourself and others
The world is full of judgement. Step beyond what has become more the norm than the exception and release judgement on yourself and others. Start where judgement begins…. within self. If we can learn to defy the need for perfection in ourselves, we become freer, happier and more open to all of life’s offerings. Be perfectly imperfect in all that you do.
#2 - Break hearts… just not your own
People will enter your life, some will stay a short time, others a lifetime. Some will break your heart through love, others through betrayal and what matters most is to never betray yourself. Stand strong in knowing who you are and what matters most, even if it means breaking someone’s heart. The truth is, it will break eventually and perhaps even shatter, in the realization that you sacrificed the unimaginable….. something of your essential self.
#3 - Cherish your parents
I remember the day my oldest nephew was born. Fear and love flooded my every cell with this indelible desire to protect him from harm. What I know to be true, is that for all that I felt, it was infinitesimal to what parents feel in that moment and for all of the moments to follow.Comfort yourself in the belief that your parents love you more deeply than you can imagine. They want only the very best life has to offer and every part of their being is dedicated to providing you with what they perhaps never had. Just remember to find your courage to follow your own path, forge your own dreams whether you think they align or not. Know this is the way to cherishing your loved ones, to making their dreams for you come true.
#4 - Define who you are from the inside
Whatever your accomplishments may be or become, that is not what defines you. What you choose to do for a living, the career ladder that you climb, that is not what defines you. Be proud of these things, they will indeed bring you prosperity and social proof. In the midst of all that you desire and wish to accomplish, remember to celebrate the person within. Be intentional about how you wish to show up in the world, the influence you have upon others. Use it wisely and with gratitude for that may be your greatest legacy. To be remembered for your kindness, your courage, your strength and your love.
#5 - Empower others
In this world that sometimes seems to relish in the demise of respect, humanity and equality… build others up. Encourage the discouraged. Share a little piece of yourself so that others may flourish. When you find yourself embarking on a journey of deprecation toward others, no matter how seemingly deserving, find a way to lift them up. However you may wish to change the world, change it first through how you treat others.
#6 - Forgive and move forward
Never underestimate the power of forgiveness. Yes some people will cause you pain, some with intent, some despite their best intentions, others in pursuit of their own ambitions. Seek to find it in yourself to forgive, not for their sake but for your own. Of anyone I know that suffers the greatest of pain, are those that have hung on to some travesty bestowed upon them whether by someone they loved or life itself. With forgiveness comes healing, so grieve all of your losses and each of your sorrows and find forgiveness so that you may forge a life without regret.
#7 - Grab every opportunity
Make it your priority to experience life at its fullest each and every day. Be unstoppable with your dreams, despite what others may say. Listen to the voice deep inside you. The one that slowly diminishes when you choose a path that others prefer. Fight the urge to say yes, when you really want to say no. Say yes to the things that scare you most - they are calling for you!These lessons I choose to impart are not a reflection of regret but a notion of hope... that those that need it most, will find the wisdom to put their ear close to their heart and listen hard. I’d love to hear what you would tell your younger self. Share here if you like